Fifty Greatest Misses

50 of my songs and stories written during and about my 50+ years living, so far...

Disclaimer... The artist (me) wishes to excuse some of the following... the crackle, cackle, buzz and pop, lazy lyrics and piquant pitching, bitching, scandal and slander. Any similarity to anyone alive or dead is occasionally unintentional.


12. Stabbed 13. Till The Morning Comes 14. Monkey

And Halloween is already upon us… so I trawled through the bag of greatest misses to find something suitably ghoulish… I found 3 candidates. They fall neatly into 3 of the main revenge fantasy categories… Victim fantasy, murder fantasy and a personal fav Power!

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12. Stabbed.
S.Rhatigan/J.F Morrison © 1997

This little country/slasher tune was inspired by some pretty extreme revenge/victim fantasies … The kind of fantasy a person might indulge in after they had been royally dumped.  Come on you’ve done it haven’t you?  Imagined you are the ultimate victim, literally killed by the betrayal, rejection whatever?  Haven’t you scripted your own funeral?  No?  You’ve never pictured your ex weeping by the graveside guilt ridden, devastated, while you haunt your old life from beyond?  Come on really?

So it’s just me then… 

Stabbed was a firm favourite in our live set around 97/98 so we put it on the ill fated Big Stick mini Album..  I say ill fated because we didn’t succeed in getting distribution for it so it was only  available at gigs or mail order.   Do you have one of these extremely rare Cdrs?  Not to worry, I will soon upload Big Stick and DIY to Bandcamp for download. JMJ how long have I been promising that!

Suzanne Rhatigan Vocals, guitar, Casio…
John Morrison Bass…
Bryn Burrows Drums…

Or

13. Till The Morning Comes
S.Rhatigan/J.F Morrison © 2000

A murder Ballad

Till The Morning comes is not so much a revenge story as a pre-emptive strike!  In hindsight I can think of a few situations where I should have spotted the trouble coming down the line and made my exit far sooner than I did.  A pre-emptive strike might have been a good course of action in one particular relationship which springs to mind, however I did get an opportunity to get some payback…

An ex of mine had been behaving rather badly while I was away on tour, which I pretty much knew to be the case. When I returned my flat was upside down, said ex told me thieves had broken in and trashed the place, apparently all they took was his video camera and some cash. I didn’t believe a word but could do nothing to disprove it… Some months later when I finally copped on and rid myself of the particular individual, I returned to the house we then shared while he was away to pick up some belongings I had left behind . There sitting on the table was the missing video camera. I couldn’t resist, I had a little look at the video inside.  Perhaps it would be footage of happier times we had apparently had. But no, I was treated to a home-porn-movie, starring the man himself, attempting to retain an erection with a head full of coke, while some woman, couldn’t say for sure if she was professional, was fluffing him up so to speak. In a moment of complete clarity I turned the camera onto myself pressed the record button and laughed leaving a little message something along the lines of, “you sad fucker”… 

It was maybe 5 years later I had a voice mail from the poor chap obviously watching back over his performance, quite perplexed and indignant, to say the least! Alls fair in love. 

Suzanne Rhatigan Vocals, guitar, Casio…
John Morrison Bass, Electro niggles…

and…

14. Monkey
S.Rhatigan/J.F Morrison © 1999

One of my favourite revenge fantasies.  Power.  I’ll show you, when my luck changes when I get my chance I’ll dole out punishment you deserve… In reality of course when that day comes you probably won’t be bothered and maybe that’s the best revenge of all!

We had great fun playing around with John’s old Watkins Copicat at that time, which features on this track.  It was horrendously unreliable, in fairness it was about 30 years old at that time and was held together with gaffer tape and elastic bands.  I was often at Charlie Watkins workshop in deepest South London with pieces of the Copicat which he always managed to repair till the next gig when it would invariably fall apart again.  One memorable visit was with my friends from Electroscope, John Cavanagh and Gayle Brogan, both vintage electronica buffs. John Cavanagh gave us our only BBC Radio One Session on his Rock Show after Late Developer was released, which was how we 1st met and became friends… Anyway, they were chuffed to meet Charlie, for them it was a bit like being a One Direction Fan asked in for tea by Harry or Niall or whoever’s mammy…. Charlie was in his eighties then, still making ground breaking electronic equipment.  His big thing when last I saw him was a midi accordion!!!???

BTW Monkey was released on a fanzine compilation record, can’t find the record don’t remember the name of the fanzine… anyone out there know?

Also Rhatigan and Electroscope released a single on Lissy Records called Unhappy Soul.  Truly a vinyl rarity, have you got it?

Suzanne Rhatigan Vocals, guitar, Casio…
John Morrison Bass…
Paul Murphy Drums…

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10. Loser – 11. Wish You Well

Another bumper double header… Loser and Wish You well were recorded on the same session with the same musicians and particularly given the drama and bombast of the bass trombone, they seem to work together what do you think?suzanne-golden-50_100x100pxl

10. Loser
S.Rhatigan J.F Morrison © 1998

I have a theory… I know there may be indignant responses to this from some of my worthy indie pals but, I think a large number of love songs are rooted not in adolescent longing or unrequited romantic disillusion, but are in fact begging letters to record companies and audiences in the face of artistic/commercial rejection. I know, I’ve got a few, but this is not one of them!

There’s no doubt the repeated let downs I’ve had, and Rhatigan as a band have endured over this period, contributed in no small part to the depth of disgust and anger quite evident in this song. No two ways about it, I was pissed off… Sure I’ve had my heart broken a little by loser boyfriends and friends, but none smarted as much as the almost big breaks that nearly broke me. Let me be clear about this, the ‘losers’ referred to in the song do not include any of the wonderful managers, agents & a&r folk that I did have the good fortune to work with, no I have other songs inspired by those relationships! It’s the bull-shitters and plamassers, the ones who habitually make promises that are not theirs to make.

But ho hum, out of adversity comes… well in my case usually songs…

A big influence on me as a singer and songwriter are great show tunes from classic musicals. I’m a sucker for a torch song or a show stopping life affirming finale, but it’s the great ‘fuck you’ rants I particularly love.. I’m thinking of songs like ‘Don’t Rain On my Parade’ from Funny Girl or ‘I’m Gonna Wash That Man Right Outta My Hair’ from South Pacific and it’s in that spirit that Loser was written… It’s a hey you know what, I don’t have to take this shit any more tune….

This lazy rock blast was meat and potatoes to Paul he somehow manages to drum like he’s falling off a cliff, yet he’s solid as the proverbial rock…. The track suited bass trombonist Shane Mills well too, you can really feel the weight of it under the guitar riff.. Boy did it feel great playing this one live…

Suzanne Rhatigan Vocal guitar…
John Morrison….
Paul Murphy Drums…
Shane Mills Bass Trombone…

11. Wish You Well….
S.Rhatigan/J.F Morrison © 1998

Perhaps the only lyric I’ve ever written which has no cynical, sarcastic prickles. Wish You Well was my farewell homage to my great friend and partner John Morrison when he embarked on Hefner’s 1st European tour circa 1998 and I realised that our idyllic song writing afternoons would be no more. We continued to write together but sadly the total immersion days were over…

John, as was customary, arrived around 2pm with his bass and when he was plugged in and seated on his spot on the sofa he immediately started playing this dramatic open A-D against the F-E resolve and I was hooked. Wish You Well wrote itself from that point… The bass trombone was a perfect fit reinforcing the drama of the riff. I would have loved the chance to record the song with an orchestra but it hasn’t happened yet! Still the dark tones of the trombone against the ambience of the guitar and Wurlitzer piano provide a hint of what might have been…

Suzanne Rhatigan Vocals, guitar, Wurlitzer…
John Morrison Bass…
Paul Murphy Drums…
Shane Mills Bass Trombone…

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09. Rise and Fall

09. Rise and Fall
S.Rhatigan © 1995

It was the dawn of a new era for me, coming out of a very dark time.  I had lost my record deal, my home, my boyfriend (though that was probably a good thing) and my best friend.  I was on my uppers, but good friends and family and music kept me going.  Had I not been in that rather precarious position at that time I may never have written the majority of these songs, never met Mark and been introduced to John and subsequently the most exciting time of my life musically and personally, might never have happened…

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